Merry Christmas!

From our family to yours :)

He wants to crawl!

Mac is getting more excited about being on the floor and is READY to crawl.

He hasn't done it yet, but he's managed to scoot a little bit.

5 Months

I'm a little behind schedule, but Mac turned 5 months old on the 20th.

Can you believe that?

My little is growing up!

And, finally, he's growing out too.  The little bugger's definently been chunking up more this month than the last!  I think he's nearing 15 pounds, thank God!

Let's watch him grow!

Update

Monday we took Maclin to see the Pediatric ENT. 
After a very quick evaluation by the doctor, he said that Maclin did, in fact, have tongue tie.  We talked about the implications and risks of having it clipped and decided that the procedure had many more benefits than negatives.
Maclin had a frenotomy...it was slightly traumatic (for me, mostly).  He nursed pretty much immediately afterwards and was calm and asleep within 30 minutes.  He took a good long nap and woke up happy.  There was minimal bleeding and he acted completely fine yesterday.  So fine, in fact, that I ended up going to work even though I had prepared to take the day off.

So far, his nursing seems improved and he seems more content after feedings.  Per direction from the lactation consultant, I'm going to slowly decrease his supplementary bottles by around 1/2 ounce a week and hopefully be done with them around Christmas.

Thank you for all the positive thoughts and prayers--it was so nice to know we had people on our team!

Mac's grateful too!

YAY!

At Mac's appointment yesterday he had gained a full pound!  Now he weighs 14 lbs 2 oz.  He also gained 1/2 an inch in height and about an inch around his head.

Praise the Lord!

So now we've got an appointment with an ENT on Monday.  I'm taking Monday and (probably) Tuesday off work.  Keep us in your thoughts--if they do the procedure it shouldn't be too traumatic for him.  I'll probably be emotional though.

Thank you for all the kind words yesterday!

The one where I admit some difficulty

I have a hard time blogging or talking about the things that bother me or upset me.  Since we've now got our situation somewhat under control, I feel ready to share.

Maclin had his 4 month check up the Wednesday before Thanksgiving and we learned that he had gained NO weight since his 2 month appointment.  Literally.  To the ounce, he weighed 13 lbs, 2 oz at both appointments.

I panicked.  Because ZOMGZOMGZOMG my baby was starving!  I am a horrible mother!  How did I not realize this?*  Luckily, my doctor was MUCH calmer than me and said that sometimes babies flat line for a while and it can't be explained.  He went on to say that based on his observation of Mac, he wasn't overly worried.  If the lack of gain was paired with lethargy or inconsolable crying, that would be cause for alarm.  Mac, however, is a happy, smiling kiddo.

* In my defense, I had called the doctor a week prior because I thought he was somewhere around 14 pounds (based on our home scale).  They said that as long as he acted fine, it could probably wait until his scheduled appointment.

The doctor did say that he wanted us to start solids immediately and see if that helped. We were instructed to feed him rice cereal 3 times a day and start adding in veggies on the following Monday.   After two weeks, we would do a weight check and re-evaluate.

I didn't really feel ready to give him solids... I hadn't properly Googled and I wasn't even planning on considering it until he was 6 months old.  But, as David so eloquently told me, we don't pay a pediatrician to ignore his advice and listen solely to Dr. Google.  So, after a 6 hour drive to my parents' house, we fed Mac his first bite of solids.

Of course, we stripped him down to his diaper...and he was confused.

The first few bites were traumatic.  I think he thought we were trying to kill him with rice cereal.  After a while we reasoned that maybe he was freaking out because he had never had milk without being held... so I tried holding him.

And things were better.... he actually seemed to enjoy it a little bit.

But by the next morning... Mac was a man who knew what he wanted.

And it was cereal!

Even squash was a hit!

So Mac started solids, but I couldn't shake the feeling that something more was going on... Dr. Google had told me that replacing breast milk with solids would hinder weight gain-- not speed it up-- because breast milk is waaaay more calorie dense than rice cereal.  I equate it to me replacing a candy bar with a piece of celery.  Which I SO have not be doing lately.  Ahem.

Because I didn't feel this could be a long-term solution, we went to see a lactation consultant that was recommended to me by my La Leche League leader.

Alyssa was AWESOME!  I felt so supported and she really calmed me down (because, obviously, there was a TON of emotional turmoil and guilt happening in my brain).  After talking to us as length, watching Mac nurse, checking out his mouth, checking out my lady bits, and weighing Maclin before and after nursing, she said she thought Mac might be tongue-tied.

Besides seeing and feeling what she felt was a short frenulum, she also said that he only managed to get 1.4 oz of milk during his 30 minute nursing session.  That might explain why my baby boy had been a SLOW nurser before--his meals could last upwards of 1 hour.

There are a lot of other indicators he fit, but the one most apparent to me is a heart-shaped tongue.  When someone with tongue tie sticks his tongue out, the tongue can appear heart shaped because the frenulum is pulling on the underside.

Check it out:

That, my friends, is a heart-shaped tongue.

I talked to my doctor and he's hesitant to do the frenetomy immediately.  So he told us to feed Mac 2 oz of pumped milk after every nursing along with his solids.  Doc says that if he has a significant weight gain, then he would be willing to refer to an ENT.

Right now, Mac's taking 21 oz of expressed milk a day along with ~4 nursing sessions...all of which last 45-60+ minutes.  I am losing my mind, because to keep up with Mac's need I need to get up in the middle of the night to pump AND pump after every nursing session.  I cannot keep this up long term...right now I'm pumping 75-90 minutes a day and nursing for about 3 hours.  Then I need to feed him the bottle (if David's not home) and wash the pump parts.  My house is not clean--and we haven't decorated for Christmas.  And I need a nap...but I always need a nap :)

We see our doctor tomorrow and I'm hopeful that Maclin's had some significant weight gain.  If he hasn't, I will probably be a hot mess.

Luckily, he's REALLY cute, so all this is totally worth it.

How I'm Losing It

Lack of sleep is taking its toll on me.  I am a confused mess!

I normally pride myself on being a person who is always on time and usually over-prepared.  Motherhood has totally changed this.  The other day, I was late to work because I had to take Big Mac to daycare...which wouldn't have been an issue except I forgot his milk and had to turn around to get it.  Whoopsy...but not something Mac could just power through for the day.

Speaking of milk, I pump several times during the day...but because I travel between two schools, I have several different pumping locations.  At least once a day, I go to my location, get set up, and realize I don't have my "pump parts," because they're in some refrigerator across the school.  So that involves me redressing for a trek across school to get my parts.

One morning, when I woke up, Mac had a bib in his crib with him.  I have  vague memory of deciding in the middle of the night that he MUST have a bib IMMEDIATELY.  Why?  I don't know.  I need to stay in bed during the night if Maclin isn't waking up.  At the very least I need to not attempt costume changes while the baby is asleep.

Sitting Up!

Can you believe it?

I wouldn't say he's mastered it, by any stretch of the imagination, but he did stay in this position long enough for me to walk across the room, grab my camera, come back, and snap a picture.

Go Mac!

Happy Monday

That is all.

4 Months!

Yesterday, Mac celebrated his 4-month birthday.

And by celebrate, I mean tolerated me taking WAAAY too many pictures of him.

I need to get better at this picture thing.

Here are some outtakes, because he's so stinking cute.

 Lately, our little man has his fist in his mouth about 90% of the time.

I think he kind of looks like a dork, but Doctor Google says he's "self-soothing."

This month, he's also mastered rolling over, sleeping without a swaddle, and picking things up to shove in his mouth.

He's become more vocal (he left church for the nursery because he got a bit too chatty) and better at conveying his emotions without a full-blown sob-fest.

Evidence: 

 "Seriously, Mom, no more pictures.  This is crazy."

Yeah, right.  Here's my growing baby...

4 Months

3 Months

2 Months

1 Month

Just Born

He's definently grown into his cheeks!

Maybe I'm biased....

But I think he's pretty stinking cute.

 This is the face I hope he'll have on Christmas morning...

...right now it's the face I get when he's looking at my chest.

Horrible

About two miles from my home, a mother has reportedly confessed to killing her 13 month old son with blunt force trauma.

I am horrified.  Shocked.  Saddened.  I'm often overtired and frustrated with life in general--and not just motherhood--but I can't imagine reaching that level.  

Let's all hug our babies a little tighter.  

Fancy Man

What?  You don't wear tuxedo t-shirts and jeans on a weekday?

Baptism

This is slow coming, but Maclin was baptized on 10-30.  

Enjoy!

MIA

Yeah, I've been MIA for almost two weeks now.

Whoopsey--being a "working mom" is a little more time consuming than I anticipated.  It turns out that all I really want to do in the evenings (after the baby is fed, bathed, asleep, and packed for the next day) is either chug some cheap wine or go to sleep.

And by cheap wine I mean the sweetest wine I can find.  Lately it's either been moscato or this blackberry local one.  My only requirement is that it's cold and sweet.  It would probably be cheaper and more effective to buy some kool-aide and load it with some vodka.    But wine feels more grown up :)

So what's happened in the last two weeks?  Well, I turned 30.  It was probably the most low-key party I've had... celebrating kind of takes a back seat when there's a baby and you're exhausted.  Saturday, I did manage an awesome "fancy" birthday dinner at the melting pot with three of my besties.  Of course I only took a picture of three of us, but that's ok :)

I had never eaten at the melting pot before and was impressed at 1a) the quantity of food-- holy cheese, salad, veggies, meat, and chocolate! and 2b) the cute flirt of a waiter we had.  Yow-za! 

On Monday (my actual birthday), I wasn't able to take Mac to daycare because of a fever, so I spent the day at home.  It was a little lonely, but nice to get some snuggle time in with my guy.  That evening, my friend Martha (green scarf above) came over and watched Big Mac while David and I went out to dinner.   We went to Sam's Steakhouse, which was A-MAZ-ZING.  I wish it fit into "regular" dinner budget, because CHEESE AND RICE that was a good meal.  We had some lobster ravioli that I might have been willing to sell a kidney for.  Holy Crap.

Once I woke up from my food coma, all was good :)

Since I last blogged, Mac also has started shooting liquids out in ways that I do not appreciate.  He managed to puke both in my MOUTH and EYE this week, which was horrible.  When he puked in my mouth, we were playing airplane and he had some impeccable aim.  I seriously have never been so close to throwing a baby in my life.  Luckily, David was there and took over parenting while I brushed my teeth and showered.  Of course, while I was doing this, Mac pooped all over his changing table.

Last night, he peed on the couch.

Babies are gross.

But cute!

Happy Halloween!

Happy Halloween from Big Mac!

And his cousin, the M & M!

I love this holiday... it marks Mac's first art project!

Man, the daycare lady is WAAAAY more creative than I am.

Working Mother

Yes, another post about going back to work.  I write about what I'm doing or thinking...so..that's what you get :)

The second and third days back to work proved even better than the first.  I went to a few meetings where I talked about things that weren't related to poop or vitamins or napping or...  I used big words.  It was fun.  As far as competence at work goes, I can kind of sort of see the loop, but I'm by no means in the loop.  Luckily, I'm good at drawing inferences from nuggets of information and can participate without seeming like a moron (I hope).  If that doesn't work, I can always fall back on maternity leave for an excuse.  And I did.  A big wig in the district asked me some question about what teachers were doing at one of my buildings and I was able to tell her that I had been in the building for 2 hours, so I wasn't quite sure.

Pretty soon I won't be able to use maternity leave as an excuse, so I am milking the crap out of it now.

Mac reportedly had great days at daycare, which calmed me down a lot.  He seems happy and content in the evenings and mornings--so maybe it's good for him.  It's no secret that it does kill me to be away from him for SO MANY hours during the day, but I feel more like myself now.  Turns out that a daily shower, clothes that aren't sweats, and feeling needed on a professional level make me feel like me.  Both of my schools have been great--multiple people have welcomed me back with treats and I even had a few tell me thank you for "everything" when I ran into them.

To summarize: I miss my big baby, but I think this can work.  Until we're independently wealthy, that is.  Then David and I both quit our jobs :)

Back to Work... For Real

Today was my first day back to work.  

Since May.

I know...no room to whine...but it was still rough.

All in all, my day wasn't too bad.  I had a couple of good meetings and kept myself busy with a project.

And I got these!

The card reads, "We love you.  David and Maclin."

I've got a couple of stellar boys.

Maclin, reportedly, did well at daycare.  Our sitter said he had to HUGE poops and ate 3 bottles.  I was thrilled because 1a) I didn't have to clean the poop (ha!) and 2b) I managed to pump one more bottle of milk than he drank.  

Score!!

Still, I missed being around my baby boy.

I think it'll get better with time. 

It has to, right?

Rolls!

Someone managed to roll over... finally!

Ignore that his pants aren't snapped... I forgot to resnap after I checked for the poops :)

Marriage Advice

I was picking up for a friend's visit this weekend and got sidetracked by my "wedding box."  It's this fancy box where I put wedding memorabilia.  Since I'm still a hormonal mess (I blame post-pregnancy hormones AND my impending return to work), I got weepy when reading our vows to each other.

I also found a bunch of advice that I was given at a couple of my showers.  Some of it made me laugh out loud, so I thought I would share a selection with you.

You might notice that this advice has a wide range...which is probably explained by saying that the age range of people at my shower varied from 16 to 83. See if you can guess which ones were younger and which were older.  :)

• Get a king size bed.
• 
  
• Respect each other's space.
• Keep God in your marriage.
• Slow down so you don't poop in the park.  (Long story that I should probably blog about)
• Don't drink tequilla!  You want to keep this one.  (Another long story...)
• Treat each other with the same respect you do your friends.
• You can be right, but you don't have to convince David...just know it yourself.
• The way to a man's heart is through his stomach.
• Always make him think things are his idea.
• Just make him happy.
• Buy lots of cereal.
• Always find time to have fun together.

And my two favorites come from my grandmothers... you might be able to pick up on the distinct personality differences between them.

• Never take on a new chore as it will be your job from then on.  (Grandma Stainbrook)
• Be very helpful and let him rest. (Grandma Brownback)

I'm not going to lie, I took Grandma Stainbrook's to heart.  Sorry Grandma Brownback :)

Happy 3 month birthday!

Today, Big Mac is 3 months old.

He's growing so fast!

I can't believe my little man is already a quarter of a year old.  It seems like he's been a part of my life and our family forever.

This month, he's becoming more and more content spending time playing interdependently---he's even gotten good at swatting at toys!

The other day at dinner he surprised us by being able to pick up a toy.   Huzzah!

He's also this close to rolling over... he gets his shoulder up and reaches...but can't get that big old rump over before he gets pissy.  Soon, though!

 Love you, Big Mac!

Back to Work

I go back to work a week from today.

Cue irrational fears and possible panic attacks.

Rationally, I know it'll be fine.  He'll be 15 weeks old by then (yeah, I took a heck of a maternity leave).  The sitter seems awesome and lives in our neighborhood...and it's good for kids to be socialized.  Blah, blah, blah, I know it'll all be ok.

I am still not looking forward to it.  I'm going to miss my little guy--our "conversations" and snuggling :)  I'm also going to miss not wearing sweatpants all day, but that's another story.  I would dress up if it meant I got to stay home.

In other news, Mac wore a 9-month outfit today....and he's going to be 3 months tomorrow.

That's my overachiever!

hahahahahaha!

My little pumpkin

On Saturday, David, Big Mac and I went to the pumpkin patch.

I was thrilled, David moderately happy, and Maclin just barely tolerated us.

I think it was too bright for him...

...but I quickly solved that with some badass sunglasses.

What, what!

Anyway, moving on.  

This post doesn't really need any words, so I'm just going to put a bunch of pictures of Mac around various pumpkin-themed items.

Mac says to have a happy Halloween...

...or he'll cut you.